I thought about going for the long, whiny version, but I think I’ll go for the minimalist version. You can fill in the whining on your own. Also, throw in some bad words for the full effect.
1. It’s Monday.
2. It snowed over night.
3. It is really windy.
4. Mark shoveled but the driveway drifted closed again.
5. The road is probably completely plugged as well.
6. School is closed.